Synopsis – (from goodreads.com)
You've seen Cannibal Holocaust. You've seen Salo. You've seen Nekromantik. You ain't seen shit Zombie prostitutes, religious rapists, horny werewolves, death by vomit, and sexual fetishes scraped off the sidewalk. From sex prisons to mafia torture chambers, hold on tight because you're about to enter the perverted and twisted mind of Edward Lee. Once you've seen what he has to show you - there's no coming back. Brain Cheese Buffet collects nine of Lee's most sought after tales of violence and body fluids. Featuring the Stoker nominated "Mr. Torso," the legendary gross-out piece "the Dritiphilist," the notorious "The McCrath Model SS40-C, Series S," and six more stories to test your gag reflex.
Rating – 4 ½ out of 5
Genre – Horror, Splatterpunk
I do not do reviews to re-tell or summarize what I have just read. My reviews offer what I think about book and the story(ies) within them. If you are looking for a summary or complete re-tell, do not bother reading any further.
Let me just say I love Edward Lee. His twistedness suits my style so perfectly! He always leaves me saying, “Oh man, I could totally envision that in my head clear as day.” Yes, I may be considered a sicko for that ability, but who cares. His books are fun! The stories he colors for me in my mind allow me to get away from everyday horrors such as politics and incessant babble from idiots living with and around me on Earth.
Brain Cheese Buffet is a nice little collection of stories. They are all typical Edward Lee and I loved every grotesque moment within.
Hillbilly-speak tends to get boring to read after awhile, but it still remains fun in that the disgusting nature of the story is still in the forefront.
Lud (a.k.a Mr. Torso) is completely disgusting. The things he does to these women are utterly unbelievable. I asked myself several times through this particular story how exactly one would even conceive of pulling off some of the things done. Edward Lee’s vivid descriptions encapsulate your imagination with very specific details. At one point I caught myself saying out loud, “AAAghhhh!! What the…..” Incorporating a religious aspect to the story was also done with zany wickedness.
Ahh Lee, so far, you’ve yet to disappoint me!
Let’s do some math here boys and girls. Mafia plus torture plus a hooker-junkie with no arms or legs named Spooky plus Wet-Naps equals what the f*^&ery!
How can anyone pass up a chance to read about the mafia doing illegal stuff? This is way beyond any mafia behind-the-scenes you have experienced on television or the movies. It truly is no-holds-barred with this freaky hooker-junkie. For those wondering, no she doesn’t simply lay there and get got by these mafia-men. She has quite the mouth on her and boy oh boy it sure does get her in trouble. The vile things they do to her are pretty sickening, but this is an Edward Lee book after all!! The ending leaves a quirky smirk on my face. All I will say is, if you are going to do something, make sure you do it right the first time.
This is another goodie.
~Grub Girl in the Prison of Dead Women~
I must say immediately that I am not a zombie type of person. Zombies bore me to death and the only two zombie movies I enjoy are the original “Night of the Living Dead” and “Zombieland”. (I have a soft-spot for Woody Harrelson.) I do not purposely read zombie books either.
As you have guessed, this little story is about zombies. The only thing that captured my attention was the variation Lee used for the zombies (grubs as they are called in the story). He went into detail about the exact food they can eat and what would happen if they ate anything other than raw food. In my mind, the story was plausible if a zombie apocalypse did really happen. It was refreshing from the usual, “brains!!” stereotype.
He also went into detail about sex and the detention center they get sent to if they get out of line. They were basically like humans, but dead and free of disease. It was the detention center that drew me in further. The things that occurred there were unsavory to say the least. Once inside there is, as usual, some douche bag, who is big and bad. The one guy who thinks he is high and almighty. He was almighty alright…almighty sorry.
This was a fun read despite it being about zombies.
This story made me look away quite a few times in absolute disgust. I found myself saying, “Ackk!! Ugh!!! Oh God!” out loud. I do not get grossed out easily, but this story was pretty awful. The story was great, but the content was simply disturbing.
Fetishes are something of the norm these days. No, most of them are still hidden from public view, but everyone knows they exist somewhere in the dark corner of people’s imaginations (or in some cases secret rooms in their homes). If you dare read this story, you will be invited into one man’s fetish. Just thinking about it makes me throw up in my mouth a little. At least his therapist could appreciate that.
I liked this story simply for the gross-out factor. It was completely and utterly grotesque. I hope no one I know has this fetish because I might have to rethink our friendship. I just couldn’t sit and look at them the same ever again.
You noticed how I haven’t said what the fetish is? That is because I would love to surprise you with how disgusting it is. Sometimes not knowing before you read makes it an even better read. I had no idea before reading it and I am glad. It made for such a more hardcore experience sitting on my bed reading.
Keep the grotesque coming Lee. You haven’t disgusted me enough….yet!
What if you found discarded sludge in the lake behind your house? I think I would sell my house and move elsewhere. It would be the right thing to do. I also wouldn’t allow anyone I knew near it.
Nightmares of this sludge contaminating a family could cause anyone to go insane. Did the dad really just see what he saw or was it a nightmare? Who’s to say! Either way it is completely gross.
What if you have children who get into the sludge? There is just no good way to explain to a child that some people are dumbasses and like to litter. Sometimes the litter they leave behind is not good for people to be around. Nightmares would be a nightly occurrence.
What if the nightmares weren’t bedtime nightmares at all, but a real life nightmare happening to your family? Could you handle it? Would you fight it?
I asked a lot of questions for my review. There is just no good way to review this story without giving important details away. It would ruin the fun at the end! I don’t want to ruin the fun for you!
This story isn’t as gross as other Edward Lee stories, but it is pretty interesting to see where it is heading.
~The Wrong Guy~
This story was great. It wasn’t incredibly gross, but revenge is awesome! There is nothing like a good revenge story. I really do not care who it is against and someone somewhere is wishing/planning theirs. If you read this story, you get to see what happens when the act of revenge is played out in spectacular detail. Yes, it gets a bit goofy here and there, but hey, we need a little goofy with our grotesque sometimes.
This was fun to read and I didn’t feel too dirty at the end!
If you have kids and/or are sensitive, please do not read this story. You will be completely ruined for life and probably a little pissed off. I generally do not read gory stories with little kids in them because I am sensitive to them. When I started this story I didn’t know something foul would involve a baby to the extent it did. I got through it though.
This story made me gag a little too. Not because of the story itself, but because of some of the imagery Lee describes. There are just some things that I do not need to picture. I am absolutely sure you will feel the same. I wish I had some eye bleach to unsee what I read in certain points. I guess if I did that, the story would not make sense!
The story overall was decent. I loved the ending with my entire blackened heart!
~The McCrath Model SS40-C, Series S~
I read, “She’ll have to eat it….otherwise she’ll drown.” Oh mafia guys, how I love thee. How many other ways can you find to torture people? Lee found another way and it is completely disturbing. I think if I were to torture someone I would totally use the McCrath Model SS40-C, Series S. What a handy tool! This planet would be a lot less polluted with BS with it in my hands.
This is a fabulously wicked story with a nice ending. Now, don’t think Lee’s books have nice endings (as in oh what a happy ending that was), but it does have a spectacular case of revenge at the end. It left me cheering for the mafia boss.
I definitely recommend this story to those with twisted minds.
Brain Cheese Buffet is a great book of short stories by Edward Lee. If you are looking for a variety of stories that are quick to read, this is the book for you. If you are not into the grotesquely disturbing, this is a never-read. Edward Lee doesn’t paint rainbows and unicorns imagery in his books. Although, if he did, there would be some sort of torture porn incorporating the unicorn’s horn into some hooker’s hoo-haa and out her mouth. Ouch!